


Gasoline on Ice

by orphan_account



Category: Hawkeye - Fandom, MCU, Marvel, Marvel Comics, Marvel Studios - Fandom, Quicksilver - Fandom
Genre: Anorexia, Anxiety Attacks, Bisexual Clint Barton, Bisexual Male Character, Fluff and Angst, Fluff and Smut, Gay Male Character, Gay Pietro Maximoff, M/M, Pietro Maximoff Lives, Post-Avengers (2012), Post-Avengers: Age of Ultron (Movie), Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Pre-Avengers: Infinity War Part 1 (Movie), Social Anxiety, playlist included
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-07-07
Updated: 2018-07-07
Packaged: 2019-06-06 19:41:41
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 931
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15202040
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: ❝Tell me something that I’ll forget, and you might have to tell me again, it’s crazy what you’d do for a friend.❞in which a broken down boy finds his whole world inside an avenger, and mistakenly lets his heart get swept away through his tears.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> this is some angst to start you off. Trigger warnings: PTSD mentions, Panic Attack.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Are you tired of me yet? I’m a little sick right now but I swear- when I’m ready I will fly us out of here.”
> 
> -cavetown

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> song for this chapter: this is home- cavetown 
> 
> trigger warnings: messy writing, PTSD/panic attack
> 
> *edited*

Pietro was cold, shivering enough to make it look like he was left outside in the middle of winter with nothing but the shirt and jeans on him. 

His silver locks were covering his face, all swerving in random detections, each and every one not caring about the boys wet face they were helping block from the world. 

Images of bullets being shot at him ran through his mind, the feeling all to real as it rang though his body. He stifled a sob into his left hand, refusing to let anybody hear him, for this was such a regular occurrence that the boy didn’t think anything of it afterward. 

His long legs were arched, his knees pressing against his forehead, fragile arms wrapped around them. He let out a quivering breath as he felt himself collapsing against the unwelcoming dirt. 

Even at the amount of times this happened, it all happened to soon, all to quick, yet all to late. He was defenceless, defenceless against his own mind. 

he knew that he would get all of this shit to save Clint, he would take this and more. He would take all of this just to be able to to see him only for a minute, than loose him forever. Pietro would give the world just to hear Clint’s laugh. 

He would give his life just to feel his heart jump at his candy-cane smile one last time. 

But he would never let Clint get close to him, he couldn’t do that to such a perfect person. He couldn’t destroy yet another heart. He couldn’t show anybody the gray and black shitstorm inside of his heart. 

He was taken out of his thoughts from hearing his name being called, he mumbled something that was shielded by his tears, still running down his pale, broken face. 

The door was unlocked as a person came in. Pietro was too gone to even attempt to try to locate who it was, he was in desperate need of affection, comfort. 

The footsteps moving next to him quickens, his heart racing as the muscular, un-named figure walled his body around the frail boy. 

his brain was yelling as it reminded him how pathetic it was to need somebody to comfort you, how pathetic it was to crave it, how pathetic it was to not push somebody away. 

All he could do was bury his face into the persons shoulder, wetting the worn black cloth cloth they bore. 

He felt his world fall apart and reassemble at the same time as the voice spoke to him, muffled but he could dissect it as the low and fragile Clint Barton. 

His mind shut down as he blocked out everything, the name “Clint” taking over all his thoughts and actions, the once  
unbearable need for comfort was soothed and replaced by something much, much more. 

Longing.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “If your world falls apart I’d start a riot.”
> 
> __
> 
> “In the dark, when you sound the alarm, we’ll find each others arms.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Song for this chapter: Start a Riot- Banners
> 
> *edited*

The word burned in the back of Pietro’s mind as he felt Clint pull away, the silver haired boy was too weak to hold onto him. He could only grasp and paw at the muddled shape in front of him in need. The desperate want and craving of Clint was something he just could not ignore, it started off as a crush and became much, much more.

It became  _love._  

Pietro never knew how much that word meant, he threw it around like a baseball, played with it like it was a game. He has had a fair share of lovers in his past, but he never cared and generally _liked_  them as much as he did Clint Barton.

The first thing he thought was “Cliché isn’t it? Having a crush on an avenger, one of Earth’s mightiest heroes?” He came to accept it, but not exactly with open arms.

He had a defense mechanism, to keep him from becoming more lost than he already is. Pietro never let somebody he was attracted to close to him, he kept his walls. He vowed never to show them his true emotions, never to let he or she get to know how thoroughly  _fucked up_ his mind truly was. 

And  _oh_ how that failed. 

It might have been his smile that truly caught Pietro off guard, the way his skin turned upward sent the young man’s heart into a frenzy. He let his guard down in that moment, and smiled back. I mean, it’s hard not to smile when somebody as whole-fucking-heartedly perfect as Clint Barton deems you as his friend. 

Now, Pietro knew the two could never be. He simply just wasn’t good enough for the wholehearted  _god_ of a man the archer is. He would never be truly enough, he would never be able to make another human feel whole, as he couldn’t even manage to force himself to wake up some slick gray mornings. 

 

But Pietro couldn’t help imagine what it would be like. The feeling of the Avenger’s hands traveling through his silver-dyed hair as he laughed. A deep, true laugh, as he feel even deeper in love with the most perfect human being on the planet. 

 

But it that could never exist. For here he was, sobbing and falling apart in the arms of a man, nevertheless the arms of the man he ever so deeply and extremely  _loved._  

So Pietro closed his eyes, letting his fears run down Clint’s deep gray shirt ad he pulled him close, savoring his woodsy and fresh scent as he dozed off into a light sleep, the hands of his soulmate holding him close as his breathing slowed.

 

He could get used to this. 


End file.
